THE WATERBOY
The Waterboy has a higher standard of hygiene than ... well... just about everyone you know. Lost on him are the joys of a saltwater dunking with Joy, or lathering up in a rainshower. He must have his shower, and it must be a long, warm one. And whatever you do, DON'T ask him to do the dishes, unless you don't mind filling up the freshwater tanks every day.
"At the beginning of our sail, we noticed that Waterboy was particularly fastidious with rinsing off his feet in the swim platform shower. We thought he had taken to
heart our desire not to mess up the bedding and upholstery on this really nice boat with our salty bodies. It was only after a couple of days that we realized he was bathing his entire body, with a rather lavish amount of water, because he decided the head was just too confining for his delicate sensibilities."
"Our Waterboy was female. She had hair to her waist. Little did I know it took 6 gallons of water per inch to wash it. After the third successive day in a row of having to refill the tanks, we did a 3-minute rule: you had water for 3 minutes, with a 30 second warning ... and then the water pump was turned off at the electrical panel! She never spoke to us again after the trip."
[Note: The names of Crew From Hell species are not intended to single out one gender or another; they just kinda go with the pictures. Ed.]
